Goal Ahead…

A Goal Without A Plan is Just a Wish

Richard Byerley was ‘officially’ the oldest person to reach the summit of Kilimanjaro. Byerley reached the summit in October 2010 at the ripe old age of 84 years and 71 days. However, his record was surpassed by Martin Kafer (85) and his wife Esther (84) in October 2012 (Kilimanjaro Guide).

But the Test progressed. Not to be outdone, the oldest woman to climb Mount Kilimanjaro (5,895 m; 19,340 ft) Angela Vorobeva, reached the summit of Mt. Kilimanjaro, Tanzania, at age 86 years 267 days, on 29 October 2015 (Guinness book of records).

Naturally, these examples of goal achievement is no small feat. What of athletes, professionals, politicians, and more? We all have goals. But what really are they? Are goals just a wish or a figment of our imagination of some ideal place that we want to be in the future? Think carefully. A goal is not a simple wish that you had a better car, a bigger house, a better job, a more profitable business, or going on a great vacation. Though it may begin with those thoughts, they are way too vague. Goals are so much more. Achieving your goal starts with understanding where you want to be and how you intend to get there.

A goal is defined as the object of a person’s ambition or effort, an aim or desired result.

Simply put, a goal is something that you are trying to do or achieve, not something that you Bury. Now that we know what goals are, let’s consider why we should set them? Simply because they give our life a sense of direction. In order to achieve our goals we must take action. We must break it down into steps to achieve. If it is for your business, what business do you want to be engaged in? How much should you be earning per day to get to your goal to become profitable? Your goals must be concrete and clear. It is very important to be clear. Spend time  making sure your goal is clear. Enlist the help of a coach if you need help.

Have A Plan

The first step to achieving your goals is to have a plan. All runners know that each race has starting blocks and a finish line. They know exactly how long the distance is and how much time it will take them to get there. They have also mapped out what they will do at each stage along the way to accomplish their goal. It’s a step by step calculated plan to succeed.To achieve your goals, start with a plan.

Write Down Your Goal

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Take the time to think about the goals you want to achieve. Then write down your goal. Commit to them in writing. Writing down your goal is the first step to achieving it. It creates a contract with yourslef to make your goals come true.

Don’t worry if the goal will take time. If you plan for it, you can do it. Don’t be afraid to dream big! Dream the impossible!

Goals Must Reflect your Values

Your goals must reflect your highest values. If you don’t believe in something, then you won’t do it. Take a moment and think about where you want your life to be, professionally and personally. See yourself doing what you dream. Make this a strong mental picture

Create a Map for Success

Next, create a map for your own destiny. By setting goals, you are acting on your life, rather than simply reacting. Make the goals Big and compelling! Something that will stretch you that when you achieve it, you feel completely satisfied. Heck, you will even motivate others!

Break into Measurable Parts

The next step in setting goals is to break it down into manageable, measurable parts. Let’s say you set a goal to climb Mount Kilimanjaro. The first thing you would do is break the goal of the trek down into smaller steps. Find out things like… where is it? How high is it? How do I get there? What is the best time of the year to climb? What guide company should I book with? How can I prepare mentally, physically, financially? And the list goes on.

Once you do your research, you will find that each small accomplishment will lead you closer to your goal. Once you have done all your preparations and you find yourself in the middle of the trek, exhausted and overwhelmed, this step-by-step thinking will keep you on course and help you reach your goal.

Create A Deadline

Assign a realistic deadline to each component of your goal, and write the deadline in your smart phone’s calendar, or whatever instrument you use. Tell someone you trust about your goal and deadline. Enlist a team if you think it will motivate you more. Doing so will further solidify your commitment.

Once that is done, you must review them daily. Look at them often so it stays on top of your mind. Don’t worry about not making all your deadlines. If you miss a deadline, reassign another. Keep reassigning it until you complete it. Keep a positive attitude in order to make your dreams a reality.

So what’s your goal? Care to share?

Finish It.

One of my favorite anecdotes is about the movie Ice Age when the chickens fought hard to save their watermelons because the ice age was coming, and would stay for a billion, billion years! So they had to prepare. During the interface, they said to the mammoth “if you don’t prepare, then doom on you, doom on you”. To which he replied, “so you have 3 melons?”

I don’t know if I stated that scene correctly… but here’s the bigger point. We must have a goal. Then when we identify the goal we must prepare. How do we do that? We plan. Plan the steps from beginning to end. Don’t leave it  Unfinished.

Here’s how:

Jonathan Milner Infographic

 

Sometimes…Pretense…


Fake it til you make it.

Act the part. 

Practice makes perfect

Just do it.

Success for sure.

Is pretending wrong? Is it wrong to  Pretend that all is well in the midst of a loss? In the midst of fear? In the midst of turmoil, and pain? Is it wrong to pretend that we too can succeed at all we put our minds to? To achieve a great feat that in our real minds we would be afraid to do? Is it wrong?

Maybe not. If pretense is what we have to do to come outside of ourselves to achieve our dreams, goals, and aspirations, I’d say go for it! Because…one day it will be for real!

Hold strong…be all you can be…and succeed!

 

Success Strategies at Miami Book Fair

Come join us at Miami International Book Fair! The event runs November 13-20, 2016. Visit us on November 18, 2016, and pick up your copy of  new release Success Strategies Workbook. Entrepreneurs, professionals, readers, come discover how you or a friend can take the next step to achieve your dreams, goals, and aspirations!

8 Traits of Toxic People

There are many who act like toxins that poison our careers, dreams, goals, and aspirations

Why does she always have to be mean? Why can’t he understand? Why is it so hard for my boss to get it? Why does she have to always be so …. toxic!

Yes, toxic. Indeed, it is a strong word which means pertaining to, affected with, or caused by a toxin, or poison. That is the meaning attributed to the word. Sad when it is used to describe an individual’s behavior. But truth be told, there are many who act like toxins that poison our careers, dreams, goals, and aspirations. Year in year out, time and again they poison our ability to succeed. Yet why do so many choose to stick around such people? Toxic people are offensive, and people hate being around them.

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So in order to succeed, we must get away from them. It is difficult when you work directly with such individuals, but when you choose them as your ‘Generous‘ friends, it’s a sure recipe for disaster.

Traits of Toxic People

Selected here are eight (8) of the characteristics described by Dr. Lillian Glass, Expert in Human Behavior. As alluded, if you see yourself in any of the traits, don’t Panic! Simply recognize the trait(s) and start the process to do something about it.  But first, brace yourselves and let’s try to understand the various characteristics.

  • The Cut-You-Downer is arrogant, mean, belittling, bitchy, hateful, self-righteous, condescending, threatened, superior, insecure, offensive, critical, sarcastic, disrespectful, underhanded, and fault-finding. They have little self-esteem and will find fault with you and with everyone else. They love to belittle, taunt, ridicule, others. They cut others down so they can build themselves up.

  • The Self-Destroyer is victim-like, unrealistic, weak, unstable, sabotaging, rejecting, negative, threatened, selfish, lifeless, desperate, unappreciative, depressed, defiant, rebellious, and out of control. They hate themselves so much that they constantly tear themselves down and harp on what’s wrong with them, while berating themselves. They usually say things like “I’m so stupid”; “that was dumb of me”; or “I’m the worst.” In essence, self-destroyers try to cut themselves down before anyone else has a chance to do it. They hardly ever accept compliments and will negate any nice or kind words that come their way. They can be so full of self-loathing that they will become alcoholics, foodaholics, drug abusers, etc. Essentially self-destroyers don’t think they are worthy of good things or deserve anything positive in life.
  • The Gossip is indiscreet, insecure, fault-finding, false, belittling, quick to place blame, brazen, hypocritical, competitive, hurtful, self-righteous, shallow, sharp-tongued, skeptical, sneaky, imposing, adversarial, conspiratorial, critical, disloyal, meddling, mean-spirited, offensive, and angry. The gossip loves to spread stories even embellish them, and may invent stories of his or her own. The gossip is usually a nosy person whose biggest pleasure is telling you about someone else’s misfortunes. He might find pleasure in telling stories about others. Gossips generally have very little going on in their own lives. So they want to be accepted and to feel important so they bring you the latest news (real or imagined).
  • The Gloom and Doom Victim is masochistic, guilt-ridden, worrisome, sabotaging, resentful, rigid, selfish, rejecting, sad, negative, petty, fault-finding, paranoid, stubborn, whiny, weak, defeatist, unimaginative, self-destructive, fearful, solemn, cowardly, depressed, skeptical, unappreciative, suspicious, lifeless, lethargic, lackadaisical, defensive, and depressed. Gloom and Doom victims are depressing to be around. Their energy really zaps you as they tell you how horrible life is, has been, and will be for them. They aim to make you feel sorry for them, but they have no interest in any advice you offer. Their preference is to wallow in self-pity, certain that the world has done them in and everybody has done them wrong. Nothing ever goes right for them. Maybe it’s because their glass is always half empty rather than half full. They blame everyone but themselves when anything goes wrong in their lives.
  • The opportunistic User is selfish, interfering, manipulative, back-stabbing, brown-nosing, secretive, indirect, disloyal, conspiratorial, dishonest, sneaky, unappreciative, underhanded, tenacious and seductive. Opportunistic users are out for themselves alone. They are fair weather friends who want you in their life only when it is convenient for them—when they can benefit. These people will do anything to get ahead. If they can benefit from someone or have benefited all they can, they discard the person like a used paper towel, without a second thought.
  • The Me, Myself, and I Narcissist is selfish, egomaniacal, lacking in self-confidence, shallow, insecure, arrogant, boring, limited, socially inept, exhausting, obnoxious, flamboyant, self-centered, indiscreet, and a show-off. They have only one thing in mind—themselves. They are the most self-centered individuals anyone can encounter. They don’t want to talk about or do anything unless it pertains to them. They want to hear about your issues only if it affects them. Their vocabularies are filled with the words “me”, “myself”, and “I”. Trying to have a conversation with a narcissist can be the most frustrating experience you will ever have, because they speak a monologue instead of a give-and-take dialogue.
  • The Competitor is provocative, fearless, fanatical, obnoxious, paranoid, offensive, pushy, aggressive, resentful, sabotaging, conniving, intense, intimated, defensive, confrontational, threatened, untrustworthy, negative, insecure, argumentative, and always looking for a fight. Competitors seek every opportunity to outwit or surpass others. Everything is a competition from getting a job to getting a boyfriend or girlfriend, husband or wife. Competitors tend to be show-offs and braggarts who gloat about their achievements—both past and present. They constantly try to impress you with how much better they are than you. In essence they have such low self-esteem that the only way they can relate to you is by turning everything into a contest.
  • The Control Freak is invasive, sabotaging, rigid, manipulative, arrogant, aggressive, forceful, backstabbing, self-righteous, meddlesome, confrontational, inflexible, egotistical, obstinate, pushy, unreasonable, stubborn, selfish, unaware, threatened, disrespectful, uncommunicative, and stubborn. Control freaks can never let go. Like bullies, they are immobilized if not in control. However, unlike bullies, they don’t always use anger or meanness to get what they want. Control freaks often use sweet talk and manipulation. They are not team players and have difficulty delegating authority, as they try to do everything themselves. If things don’t go their way, they get angry or lose interest, for they feel they must always be in charge. Their lives are filled with frustration and disappointment and never go with the flow. Instead, they force things to happen and when things don’t go their rigid way they panic and become angry or more manipulative.

Did any of these traits remind you of someone you knew? If so what effect has it had on your success? Maybe it’s time for a change.

10 Things That Would Build an Effective Relationship

Written by Success Vista‘s Founder, Ibibo Ataisi Justin

 
Relationship is one of the most important factors that determine our success in every aspect of our lives. The quality of your relationship can build or destroy your life.

Having an effective relationship is not something that is done overnight, but through painstakingly applying some set of skills and techniques.

Effective relationship is something that cannot be overemphasized in today’s workplace. No business can thrive in the long term without building quality relationships with its employees, customers and suppliers. Also, it is quality relationship that oils the wheel of friendship, and even marriages.

Our society is totally sick because of strained relationships among people, countries, tribes, races, etc.  For us to improve the quality of our lives, we must also improve the quality of our relationships.

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Interestingly, society is defined as a web of relationships, which requires all parties to work and contribute their share in order to achieve a common goal. Having a relationship that is good, where cooperation and respect are manifested, can make society work better. In this way each member works for the good of the whole and towards achieving a common goal. This can only be attained with effective and efficient relationships.

Here are 10 practical tips to improve the quality of our relationships.

  1. Understanding. 

Understanding the other person’s feelings and position creates an effective relationship. The easiest method to understand what is important to another person is to ask them what they want and listen to what they have to say. When the other person realizes this, they feel the importance given to them.

Effective relationships require individuals to openly express their feelings and positions on all matters pertinent on the relationship. Assuming that the other person understands our needs and will give us what we need when we need it, without asking for it, is not a good practice.

  1. Respect. 

Respect is the key to relationship. In order to create a more effective relationship, parties should treat each other with respect. We can show respect just by listening to the other party and by trying sincerely to understand how they function.

You can also show respect to other parties by confirming that they are doing everything they can. Respect is the very foundation for a great relationship. This also means respecting yourself and respecting others.

  1. Trust. 

This is very important for any sustainable relationship. You must earn the trust of others, because any act of suspicion can destroy any relationship overnight. The bottom line here is that your words should be your bond.

  1. Value creation

The quality of your relationship to a large extend would be determined by what you are able to offer. Your intention should be to add value into any relationship you create

  1. Gratitude. 

Always show appreciation to other individual for any little that is done. This makes them to feel important and willing to be committed to such relationship.

  1. Individual differences. 

We must also understand that we are all unique entities and as such, we have our different values and ideology. It is important that we identify these and treat them accordingly.

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  1. Clearly define roles. 

Also, it is essential that each individual understand the role they are expected to play in order to sustain the relationship. This is important as it helps to reduce the possibility of conflicts in the future.

  1. Empathy. 

Seeing things from the perspectives of others also makes them feel that you are interested in their well-being and progress. The point here is that you put yourself in the position of others before you make any decision.

  1. Service. 

Relationship is like the game of table tennis. If you don’t serve, you won’t receive any service in return. You must be willing to give the highest quality of service you can render at all times.

  1. Golden rule

Always do unto others as you want them to do unto you. If you give your best to any relationship, you would also attract the best from such relationship.

The Hikes of Success

Traveling in the slow lane, I  get angry. I get upset. Forgetting that I’m traveling in the slow lane. My progress is slowed. My destination eludes me and seem to get further away. My anger grows. My frustration… like a fuse lights up, ready to explode!

But that’s how it is with life. Missed steps, missed deadlines, procrastination. Failed  business, exams, twisted careers, and more cause us to feel like we  are driving in the slow lane. Our goals, dreams, aspirations seems unreachable. We get angry, frustrated, feel punished. But that’s because we have gone off course. We fail to plan. We fail to focus. We fail to keep our eyes on the goal. Milestones recede…ebbs away in the distance. One by one. We procrastinate saying I’ll get it done tomorrow…, but tomorrow never comes.

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But all is not lost. Achieving our goal is like a Hike. If carefully planned our long walk to success can be achieved one step at a time. One foot before the other..again and again, and again. And if we plan it, we are able to enjoy the beauty of the experience along the way.

Today, take a step in the right direction. If you slipped… get up, dust yourself off, and get back on track. Your goal will be a step closer for sure.