On 2nd Thoughts: Leadership & Power

If you build it, will they come?

Leadership as the ability to cause other persons to act in desired ways for the benefit of the organization or group

As the citizens of the United States prepare for the passing of the baton to another President, it might be worth it to pause and reflect on leadership and power. Many are having Second Thoughts about what to do to influence the passing of the baton to another incumbent.

For that matter, our reflections turn to consider what is leadership? What is power? How can leaders positively influence the action of others? Is there a right way? Is there a wrong way? Does it differ at the worldwide level from that of the organizational and individual levels? These questions have tugged at my mind as I contemplated the sources of power and sought to identify individuals in organizations who exemplify these attributes.

Leading Leaders

img_6367

Selacuse in his book “Leading Leaders” discussed the category of powerful people whom he defined as the ‘elites’. Despite the natural negative connotation derived from this term, these are individuals who have “more” – more education, more talent, more money and more clout than ordinary people. Their knowledge, skills, money or power give elites (customarily leaders) special privileges.

A Bushy Comparison

Persuasion before action

Moreso Selacuse defined leadership as the ability to cause other persons to act in desired ways for the benefit of the organization or group.  He conveyed an interesting spin on contrasting leadership at the presidential level. A comparative analysis was done on the leadership style of President George H.W. Bush with the leadership of his son President George W. Bush.  Father Bush strongly believed that if other nations were to join the coalition to drive Iraq from Kuwait, the United States had to take an active, energetic leadership role in convincing them to join the coalition.  He believed that leadership required diplomacy across a broad front and exhibited this through direct contact with other world leaders.  Moreover, he did this through diplomatic missions; through action at the United Nations and other international organizations; through foreign embassies in the United States; and through American ambassadors abroad – to build and maintain a coalition of nations united in their efforts to achieve the goal to drive Iraq from Kuwait.  George H.W. Bush’s leadership was based on persuasion before action.

If you build it will they come?

In contrast to his leadership style, his son George W. Bush acted under the belief that other countries had no choice but to follow the United States.  George W. Bush and his administration believed that leadership by the United States seemed to flow automatically from its status as the world’s only superpower.  At the time, the administration made it publicly clear that if other countries did not follow the U.S. into the war against Iraq, they would go to war alone.  That certainly deviated from the importance of creating a coalition.  They believed that unilateral action by the U.S. would naturally lead to multilateral action by other countries.  The “if you build it they will come” doctrine expressed the belief that the United States was a unique country not just in terms of its power but also its moral authority for using that power.

To summarize this comparative analysis, Bush – the father, had broad experience in international diplomacy and long-standing relationships with world leaders at that time. He intimately knew and was on a first-name basis with national leaders and used this to his advantage to influence worldwide leaders.  On the other hand, his son had no previous diplomatic experience and did not know the foreign leaders.  Therefore, he often delegated important tasks to other members of his administration. Naturally then, he did not have the influence that his father did.  In my opinion, this was indeed an interesting view on the issue of leadership and power at the global nation-wide level.

Definitely something to consider as we step into the future of our country, organizations or at the individual level of leadership, power and success.

Choose wisely.

 

Being Micro Managed?


You Micro Manager! Yes you. Repeat after me…I will not micromanage. I will not micromanage. I will not micromanage. These are the best words of caution for new managers.

Micromanagement is a management style whereby a manager closely observes or controls the work of subordinates or employees. Micromanagement generally has a negative connotation. Wiki

I was asked the question why some managers feel it necessary to micro manage. Reflecting on that I decided to share through this post.

Managers who micromanage makes coming to work a nightmare. Micro Management is the practice of managing with excessive control or attention to detail. It tells employees that there is a lack of trust. Essentially that the manager has little confidence in his/her team and their capabilities. Often it drives the team away and what is worse, it is the organization’s most talented people who frequently walk away. The company is then left with those workers who will simply show up for a ‘paycheck’. No commitment, no care.

Signs of Micro Management

If you are a micro manager, Harvard Business shared signs that can be seen:

  • You’re never quite satisfied with deliverables
  • You often feel frustrated because you would have gone about the task differently
  • You laser in on the details and take price and/or pain in making corrections
  • You constantly want to know where all your team members are and what they are working on
  • You ask for frequent updates on where things stand
  • You prefer to be cc’d on emails

As a manager, this is certainly grounds for disaster. You will either drive your team crazy or stress yourself out with the inevitable burn out.

How to Manage:

As a new manager if you find yourself micro managing here are a few points to keep in mind:

  • Don’t be afraid to fail. At its very core is the feeling that if you don’t do things yourself, things are going to fail. Not so. This is a myth. Sometimes failure is good. It helps us learn and grow, and our teams may end up with the belief that you are ‘human’. They will work together with you to achieve the results. Essentially, you will win.

img_7135

  • Focus on the ‘what’ not the ‘how’. I am a firm believer in sharing the organization and your department’s goal with your team.  Doing so stimulates their creativity and provides solutions that you may not have considered.
  • Let it go. The difference between managing and micromanaging is in the ‘micro’. Let go of watching people. Here’s how:

-Look at your to-do list to see which task can be passed on or delegated to those reporting to you.

-Engage your team. Let them know what level of detail you expect from them and where they need to connect with you.

-Think Big. Focus on the big issues that you need to concentrate on and place your energy and attention on those.

Being Micro-Managed?

If you are being micro-managed, Research Psychologist Dr. Peggy Drexler suggests a few pointers you can use to remain sane:

  • Do your job well.
  • Ask how you’re doing
  • Be a proactive communicator. Copy supervisor on emails. Keep him/her up to date on your activities before being asked.
  • Teach him/her how to delegate. Volunteer to help with tasks or projects and keep your manager abreast of the progress.

Practicing these points will help you succeed. The converse is also true. Continuing to micro manage is Ancient…a thing of the past where autocratic leadership was game. Doing this now is sure grounds for disaster.

So it’s your choice. Choose wisely and experience success.

Finish It.

One of my favorite anecdotes is about the movie Ice Age when the chickens fought hard to save their watermelons because the ice age was coming, and would stay for a billion, billion years! So they had to prepare. During the interface, they said to the mammoth “if you don’t prepare, then doom on you, doom on you”. To which he replied, “so you have 3 melons?”

I don’t know if I stated that scene correctly… but here’s the bigger point. We must have a goal. Then when we identify the goal we must prepare. How do we do that? We plan. Plan the steps from beginning to end. Don’t leave it  Unfinished.

Here’s how:

Jonathan Milner Infographic

 

Sometimes…Pretense…


Fake it til you make it.

Act the part. 

Practice makes perfect

Just do it.

Success for sure.

Is pretending wrong? Is it wrong to  Pretend that all is well in the midst of a loss? In the midst of fear? In the midst of turmoil, and pain? Is it wrong to pretend that we too can succeed at all we put our minds to? To achieve a great feat that in our real minds we would be afraid to do? Is it wrong?

Maybe not. If pretense is what we have to do to come outside of ourselves to achieve our dreams, goals, and aspirations, I’d say go for it! Because…one day it will be for real!

Hold strong…be all you can be…and succeed!

 

8 Traits of Toxic People…

There are many who act like toxins that poison our careers, dreams, goals, and aspirations

Why does she always have to be mean? Why can’t he understand? Why is it so hard for my boss to get it? Why does she have to always be so …. toxic!

Yes, Toxic. Indeed, it is a strong word which means pertaining to, affected with, or caused by a toxin, or poison. That is the meaning attributed to the word. Sad when it is used to describe an individual’s behavior. But truth be told, there are many who act like toxins that poison our careers, dreams, goals, and aspirations. Year in year out, time and again they poison our ability to succeed. Yet why do so many choose to stick around such people? Toxic people are offensive, and people hate being around them.

toxic-people

So in order to succeed, we must get away from them. It is difficult when you work directly with such individuals, but when you choose them as your ‘Generous‘ friends, it’s a sure recipe for disaster.

Traits of Toxic People

Selected here are eight (8) of the characteristics described by Dr. Lillian Glass, Expert in Human Behavior. As alluded, if you see yourself in any of the traits, don’t Panic! Simply recognize the trait(s) and start the process to do something about it.  But first, brace yourselves and let’s try to understand the various characteristics.

  • The Cut-You-Downer is arrogant, mean, belittling, bitchy, hateful, self-righteous, condescending, threatened, superior, insecure, offensive, critical, sarcastic, disrespectful, underhanded, and fault-finding. They have little self-esteem and will find fault with you and with everyone else. They love to belittle, taunt, ridicule, others. They cut others down so they can build themselves up.

  • The Self-Destroyer is victim-like, unrealistic, weak, unstable, sabotaging, rejecting, negative, threatened, selfish, lifeless, desperate, unappreciative, depressed, defiant, rebellious, and out of control. They hate themselves so much that they constantly tear themselves down and harp on what’s wrong with them, while berating themselves. They usually say things like “I’m so stupid”; “that was dumb of me”; or “I’m the worst.” In essence, self-destroyers try to cut themselves down before anyone else has a chance to do it. They hardly ever accept compliments and will negate any nice or kind words that come their way. They can be so full of self-loathing that they will become alcoholics, foodaholics, drug abusers, etc. Essentially self-destroyers don’t think they are worthy of good things or deserve anything positive in life.
  • The Gossip is indiscreet, insecure, fault-finding, false, belittling, quick to place blame, brazen, hypocritical, competitive, hurtful, self-righteous, shallow, sharp-tongued, skeptical, sneaky, imposing, adversarial, conspiratorial, critical, disloyal, meddling, mean-spirited, offensive, and angry. The gossip loves to spread stories even embellish them, and may invent stories of his or her own. The gossip is usually a nosy person whose biggest pleasure is telling you about someone else’s misfortunes. He might find pleasure in telling stories about others. Gossips generally have very little going on in their own lives. So they want to be accepted and to feel important so they bring you the latest news (real or imagined).
  • The Gloom and Doom Victim is masochistic, guilt-ridden, worrisome, sabotaging, resentful, rigid, selfish, rejecting, sad, negative, petty, fault-finding, paranoid, stubborn, whiny, weak, defeatist, unimaginative, self-destructive, fearful, solemn, cowardly, depressed, skeptical, unappreciative, suspicious, lifeless, lethargic, lackadaisical, defensive, and depressed. Gloom and Doom victims are depressing to be around. Their energy really zaps you as they tell you how horrible life is, has been, and will be for them. They aim to make you feel sorry for them, but they have no interest in any advice you offer. Their preference is to wallow in self-pity, certain that the world has done them in and everybody has done them wrong. Nothing ever goes right for them. Maybe it’s because their glass is always half empty rather than half full. They blame everyone but themselves when anything goes wrong in their lives.
  • The opportunistic User is selfish, interfering, manipulative, back-stabbing, brown-nosing, secretive, indirect, disloyal, conspiratorial, dishonest, sneaky, unappreciative, underhanded, tenacious and seductive. Opportunistic users are out for themselves alone. They are fair weather friends who want you in their life only when it is convenient for them—when they can benefit. These people will do anything to get ahead. If they can benefit from someone or have benefited all they can, they discard the person like a used paper towel, without a second thought.
  • The Me, Myself, and I Narcissist is selfish, egomaniacal, lacking in self-confidence, shallow, insecure, arrogant, boring, limited, socially inept, exhausting, obnoxious, flamboyant, self-centered, indiscreet, and a show-off. They have only one thing in mind—themselves. They are the most self-centered individuals anyone can encounter. They don’t want to talk about or do anything unless it pertains to them. They want to hear about your issues only if it affects them. Their vocabularies are filled with the words “me”, “myself”, and “I”. Trying to have a conversation with a narcissist can be the most frustrating experience you will ever have, because they speak a monologue instead of a give-and-take dialogue.
  • The Competitor is provocative, fearless, fanatical, obnoxious, paranoid, offensive, pushy, aggressive, resentful, sabotaging, conniving, intense, intimated, defensive, confrontational, threatened, untrustworthy, negative, insecure, argumentative, and always looking for a fight. Competitors seek every opportunity to outwit or surpass others. Everything is a competition from getting a job to getting a boyfriend or girlfriend, husband or wife. Competitors tend to be show-offs and braggarts who gloat about their achievements—both past and present. They constantly try to impress you with how much better they are than you. In essence they have such low self-esteem that the only way they can relate to you is by turning everything into a contest.
  • The Control Freak is invasive, sabotaging, rigid, manipulative, arrogant, aggressive, forceful, backstabbing, self-righteous, meddlesome, confrontational, inflexible, egotistical, obstinate, pushy, unreasonable, stubborn, selfish, unaware, threatened, disrespectful, uncommunicative, and stubborn. Control freaks can never let go. Like bullies, they are immobilized if not in control. However, unlike bullies, they don’t always use anger or meanness to get what they want. Control freaks often use sweet talk and manipulation. They are not team players and have difficulty delegating authority, as they try to do everything themselves. If things don’t go their way, they get angry or lose interest, for they feel they must always be in charge. Their lives are filled with frustration and disappointment and never go with the flow. Instead, they force things to happen and when things don’t go their rigid way they panic and become angry or more manipulative.

Did any of these traits remind you of someone you knew? If so what effect has it had on your success? Maybe it’s time for a change.

23 Signs You Have a Bad Boss

 

We have all had to deal with bad bosses at one time or the other throughout our career. We scream, complain, lose the Zing, become demotivated, do barely enough to get by, or inevitably jump ship. If you are dealing with a bad boss here are a few examples of characteristics  that depicts the behavior.

 

 

Common Bad Boss Behavior

img_6747

  1. Lack of vision and inability to communicate effectively
  2. Micromanaging
  3. Thinking you have all the answers and that you must have all the answers
  4. Working late everyday
  5. Poor Hiring Decisions
  6. Failure to Admit Mistakes
  7. Takes the credit but gives the blame
  8. Does not Lead by Example
  9. My way or the high way
  10. Mistakes being liked for being respected
  11. Provides little/no feedback or coaching
  12. Shows favoritism
  13. Task-focused vs team-oriented
  14. Embraces the status quo
  15. Being a good ‘doer’ means you will be a good manager
  16. Selects and leads based on “like me”
  17. Ignores diversity of thought or varying opinions
  18. Past focused vs present/future
  19. Lacks courage
  20. Being a friend instead of a leader
  21. Failing to delegate and demonstrate trust
  22. Allowing ego and pride to get in the way of good decisions
  23. Personal agendas/motives

If you are a new manager, reflect on these characteristics. Recognize the signs and plan to change. You will then be on your way to becoming a good leader.

Top 10 Success Quotes

Elegant

I love Quotes. They inspire us to achieve; to go after our dreams, goals and aspirations. They motivate…instilling the desire to move beyond our comfort zone to attain new heights. Quotes encourage… giving us hope especially when we must ride those difficult waves of tough economic times, health scares, job changes, or more. It’s rather comforting to reach for those Quotes that boost our confidence to keep moving forward to maintain the drive for success.

Inspirational Quotes connect us with individuals who have been there done that. Many are the words of famous, influential historical figures whose words last well beyond their years. It is not uncommon for teachers, coaches, and mentors to use the power of Quotes to stimulate our desire to reach our goals. We are driven by their faith in us …that we can accomplish that great feat. Our innate desires sparked, we move forward with renewed zeal.

Success Quotes

Here are 10 of my favorite Success Quotes.

  1. The starting point of all achievement is desire  –Napoleon Hill

 

  1. Success is not final: failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts –Winston Churchill

 

  1. In order to succeed, we must first believe that we can – Nikos Kazantzakis

 

  1. Always be yourself, express yourself, have faith in yourself, do not go out and look for a successful personality and duplicate it  –Bruce Lee

 

  1. All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure                                                                                                                                  ―Mark Twain

 

  1. You don’t make progress by standing on the sidelines whimpering and complaining. You make progress by implementing ideas   –Shirley Chisholm

 

  1. Success is nothing more than a few simple disciplines, practiced every day  –Jim Rohn

 

  1. Happiness lies in the joy of achievement and the thrill of creative effort                                                                                                                               –Franklin D. Roosevelt

 

  1. The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack of will     –Vince Lombardi

 

  1. With Every Success Comes Celebration            -Elaine Cameron-Walters

 

 

Do you have a favorite motivational Quote? Do share! We want to hear!

 

3 Ways to Become An Expert in Your Field


Rome was not built in a day. Neither is your business. Success is as a result of hard work dedication, and persistence. Being seen as an Expert can go a long way in leveraging your business for success.

So how can you establish yourself as an expert? For the purpose of today’s prompt, I decided to share Female Entrepreneur’s three tips on how to become an expert in your field. Naturally, these are not all inclusive but is a solid foundation to begin. They serve as a starting point for you to establish yourself and your business as an expert in your field.

1. Get your name in the media

2. Pursue Speaking Engagements

3. Build Strategic Alliances

Mistake Mistakes

Mistakes are opportunities to learn. Move on.


Error, blunder, fault, inaccuracy, omission, miscalculation, misunderstanding, misinterpretation, oversight. Whatever you call it. Mistakes are opportunities to learn.

 
Move on

21 Iconic Leaders Define Success

So what does Success really mean to those who try so hard to get it, yet it moves further and further away as they draw near. Trying the short route some play the lotto… anticipating overnight success. Some marry rich. Some scheme, connive, and conspire just to taste the mouthwatering trappings of success.

Michael Jackson, Whitney Houston, Prince, Beyoncé, Adele, Will, Denzel Washington, Taylor Swift, and the list goes on. Without a doubt few will argue that these individuals experienced success. Come to think of it, Michael Jackson even produced an album 5 years after his death! Now to many…that’s success! But… is it really?

img_6161

Determined to find out Why Some Individuals Succeed While Others Don’t, I decided to research the topic of success. I conducted a phenomenological study, interviewed outstanding leaders in business, and other industries. I even wrote a book on Success, and published a peer reviewed article in the JAABC Business Journal about it.

So what does Success really mean to those who try so hard to get it, yet it moves further and further away as they draw near. Trying the short route some play the lotto… anticipating overnight success. Some marry rich. Some scheme, connive, and conspire just to taste the mouthwatering trappings of success.

Personally, I sought to educate myself not necessarily with the focus of being successful since I already was …as I defined it. I went to college earned several degrees including two Masters, and a Doctorate, combined with many years in International Business. Now some would admit that I am successful as society envisions it, but bearing the delectable scars of student loans, how many would agree? (Couldn’t resist that ..smile).

“Success is definitively defined as the attainment of wealth, honors and the like”

So I have pulled together definitions from 21 of Society’s Iconic leaders. Take a look. Reflect. Adopt one, or share your own definition.  Remember it has always been said that only you can define what success really means to you.

John Wooden

Success is peace of mind, which is a direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you did your best to become the best you are capable of becoming.

img_6162-1
Michelle Obama

Success is not about how much money you make but about the difference you make in people’s lives.

Winston Churchill

Success is going from failure to failure without losing enthusiasm.

Thomas Edison

Success is 1% inspiration, 99% perspiration.

Steven Covey

If you carefully consider what you want to be said of you in the funeral experience you will find your definition of success.

img_6164
Colin Powell

Success is the result of perfection, hard work, learning from failure, loyalty and persistence.

Nelson Mandela

Everyone can rise above their circumstances and achieve success if they are dedicated to and passionate about what they do. Do not judge me by my successes, judge me by how many times I fell down and got back up again.

img_6165
Albert Einstein

Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value

Woody Allen

Eighty percent of success is showing up.

Barack Obama

The real test is not whether you avoid this failure, because you won’t. It’s whether you let it harden or shame you into inaction, or whether you learn from it; whether you choose to persevere.

maya angelou
Maya Angelou

Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it.

Martin Luther King Jr.

We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope.

Mary Kay Ash

Don’t limit yourself. Many people limit themselves to what they think they can do. You can go as far as your mind lets you. What you believe, you can achieve.

Alexander Graham Bell

Before anything else, preparation is the key to success.

Ellen DeGeneres

I work really hard at trying to see the big picture and not getting stuck in ego. I believe we’re all put on this planet for a purpose, and we all have a different purpose. When you connect with that love and that compassion, that’s when everything unfolds.

Michael Dell

You don’t have to be a genius or a visionary or even a college graduate to be successful. You just need a framework and a dream.

img_6166
Oprah Winfrey

The key to realizing a dream is to focus not on success but significance and then even the small steps and little victories along your path will take on greater meaning.

Abraham Lincoln
Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other.

Napoleon Hill

Patience, persistence, and perspiration make an unbeatable combination for success.

Mark Twain

All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence; then success is sure.

img_6163
Mother Teresa

To love others as God loves you, that is the measure of success.

So there you have it. 21 of Society’s Iconic leaders as they defined success. Look at them again… for a few times if necessary. Pause; reflect; adopt one; or share your own definition.

Remember, only YOU can define what success really means to you.

What’s your definition? Do share. We would love to hear.

Cheers!

Tafur Property Maintenance

House & Roof Soft Washing

Moonwashed Musings

bemused razzle-dazzle

GREENLiGHT

When God Says Go

HEALTH + INSPIRATION

Poetry • Wellness • Life

My Sister My Friend

Family. Youth. Parenting

Kamileon Photography

Your Focus. Our Lens.

WordPress.com Courses

Educational Resources for WordPress.com

I Speak. You Read.

Poetry That Inspires

%d bloggers like this: