Goals. The Path. When You Can’t See Clearly, Slow Down…

Goals. The Path. When You Can’t See Clearly, Slow Down or even Stop. ~ Dr. Shelly Cameron

The news reported sisters returning from a trip to Disneyland. The driver a mom in her early 20s, could hardly see due to immense fog and rain. She accelerated to get past the fog. Sadly, she drove head-on into another car that caused two fatalities. One family member said they couldn’t see clearly and that’s what caused the accident.

Innovation and Industry Disappearance

A friend shared with me a compilation of research that discussed the demise of Kodak whose name years ago was synonymous with photos. Gone. Disappeared. Artificial intelligence has taken over business.  If we consider the likes of Uber, where a driver shows up at the click of a button to take you wherever you want to go. Airbnb vacation rentals has created disruption in the hotel industry. Social media giant Facebook, and other devices recognizes the face of our friends, family, colleagues without even a click or a whisper.

And there are more.

Things Change

Things change. We create goals and invest the time for them to become real. But if we are not careful about monitoring our rapidly changing environment, we suddenly discover that what we are working towards, no longer exist. A politician spent time networking and missed the application deadline to run for office. Though she had the mass of supporters who were willing to get behind her, she was disqualified because her application was late. Tis sad.

Don’t Be Alarmed

But don’t be alarmed. If you are in the midst of forging ahead with a business entrepreneurship endeavor, pursuing college education, extending your family, or planning a vacation, be keen. When you can’t see your way clearly, you may need to slow down or even stop, if necessary. It’s only wise. Accelerating and going full speed ahead can be dangerous. At times you may need to pause and reflect. Are you still on track? Is it even still applicable? If you are not paying attention, and things change, it’s necessary to recoup and see if you need to change direction, make a U-turn or try something new.

Today I encourage you to open wide your eyes. Try to see clearly the path you need to take? Are you still on track? Need help? Let’s connect.

Cheers!

Advertisements

Shucks! I Ran The Red Light…

I ran the red light.

It’s peak hour. Early morning. Light’s green. Bottle-neck. Car turns slowly. Suddenly, driver comes out of nowhere and cuts me off. Oh, I’m going to be late. Late for meeting. Late for work. Disappointed. Angry. GreenLight changes. Turns orange. About to turn red. Late for work. Unnecessary delays. I hastened to not let that light catch me. But then it did …because of the irresponsibility and carelessness of others.

I drove through angrily!

Reflection

Oh what did I do?

Then I started thinking that for sure I am going to have to pay the penalty charge for running-a-red light. The slow driver. The driver that cut me off. None of them will have to pay. Just me. I began thinking… is it worth it? Is it worth it to react in a moment of delay? In a moment of impatience? Just to get to meeting/work on time?

My Practice

It’s my practice to urge my girls and others to be careful on the road. To be patient. To exercise that patience. Yet I ended up doing the exact same thing. I am thankful that I did not have an accident. So often it is the same reaction that causes serious accidents. But I got lucky. Even though I knew better, I did not act accordingly.

Pursuit of Goals and Dreams

How often does that happen to us in the pursuit of our goals. For me it was the distance to get to my meeting/work. For you it may be goals such as further studies, marriage, starting a family, purchasing a car, house, career change, or other. Then things go awry and we think twice. In some cases we give up.

Today, I encourage you to never give up. Hold on. Be strong. Keep going. You will be glad you did. Need help? Lets connect

Cheers!

The 3 Signs Your Friends And Loved Ones Keep You Stuck…

Growth is painful. Change is painful. But nothing is as painful as staying stuck where you do not belong. ~N.R. Nanyana Murthy

Many of us have been there. We have dreams, goals and aspirations. But we must share such desires with those closest to us to get their buy-in…and in some cases their approvals. But while we wait, it can create tension, sadness, and disappointment that causes us to become stuck. Stuck because what we want to do seems way beyond our scope of accessibility.

But there’s hope if we recognize the signs of how our loved ones and friends can hold us back from realizing our dreams.

3 Signs They Are Holding You Back

1.Their expectations

Your loved ones and friends can’t imagine you dong anything else. A colleague of mine spoke about having to convince his parents that he wanted to change careers and become an entrepreneur. He was hindered by them because they were proud of him being in his prestigious job that took care of his family.  How could he walk away from that? How will they (his parents) introduce him to their friends? What’s this entrepreneurship endeavor… they asked.

2. Their Investment

Often our loved ones hinder us because they are invested in us and expect us to stay put. Are you the main breadwinner? Will you now be putting them at risk? Is it a co-worker whose job ties closely into your own? Who will they rely on if you walk away? How will they survive?

3. Envy

The worst case occurs when friends, family, or co-workers discourage your progress simply because they envy you. They want to step out themselves but have always been afraid. They don’t have the guts to do it, so they discourage you.

Today, may you find the courage to get up and do what you have always wanted to do. Step out. In some cases it might be necessary to ‘keep your mouth shut‘. Keep your plans to yourself. Then once you have put your plans in place and are ready to go, share your decision. You’ll be guaranteed of moving on to that exciting state where change thrills as you make the leap!

Cheers!

When Goals Differ …

I was driving behind a car when the traffic light changed to orange. It was more than enough time for the car ahead to go through. But the man behind the wheel purposely slowed down to stop. Naturally I was annoyed.

As I looked at him I realized his goal was to stop to smoke. Mine was to get to work on time. Drove me crazy.

He was chilling. I was late. He appeared to have gone to the gym and was unhurriedly getting back. I needed to go to the gym but can’t (smirk). He may have a job that he can go when he pleases. Mine was to get there early or else…

But though I hated his actions, he was living his choice. I have to live with mine. We must stick with the choices we make. What’s your choice today?

Goals do differ. But we must be careful of goals that should be aligned such as on-the-job, or relationships. Some goals must go together as in organizations, joint partnerships, marriage and the like.

Check yourself.Are you on track with your goal? When things go awry, what do you do? Do share, we’d love to hear.

Cheers!

The 5 Strategies of Successful Achievers…

They begin with the end in mind
They set specific and challenging goals

10a3fa7c-044a-44a8-9d30-f4a3a7126a69

A 2-week getaway to Singapore! For 2 years that’s what she planned. All with the bells and whistles of flight, hotels, cruise, and cultural site visits along the way. She did it with the spirit and taste of satisfying dreams.

But how many of us actually do that? Create our goals, plan it, save for it, and not deviate. Hers was a vacation to a far away land. Ours may be Entrepreneurship, a job, career, exercise, home ownership, writing, starting a family, and more. Often we start off with a bang! Then we stall. Procrastinate or give up.

Marcel Schwantes shared Article that Science Says Only 8 Percent of People Actually Achieve Their Goals. Here Are 7 Things They Do Differently. Of the 7, I like 5. Here I share my favs:

Things Done Differently

  1. They begin with the end in mind
  2. They build a support system around them
  3. They set specific and challenging goals
  4. They recognize when they are procrastinating
  5. They don’t multi-task

How about you? How do you stay on track to achieve your own goals? Do share. We’d love to hear.

Cheers!

Try New Things…

pexels-photo-332208.jpeg

Isn’t it funny how day by day nothing changes but when you look back everything is different? ~C.S. Lewis

I dare you! Without hesitation she jumped off the cliff  fully clad into the menacing waters below. “Way cool!!”  her friends screamed.

Just think about that situation. How often do we act like that in our lives (well not to jump off a cliff which is a bit extreme), but do we dare to try new things? To step out; to take that leap that we are so afraid of?

I dare you… is a challenge to do something at hand. 

Amidst the Noise that exists, reflect on C.S. Lewis quote about how things change. Our tasks come and go…day-in-day-out. Months pass; and before we know it…years. We look back and realize that everything is different. Yet for many of us, things still remain the same. Our dreams, goals, entrepreneurial, and career aspirations remain at a stand still. We tremble at the sight of the raging waters below, afraid to jump!

On the flip side there are those who step forward, take the leap, and discover triumphs they never knew existed! In order to be successful, you have to be motivated! And motivation comes from within! Enter self-efficacy which means  the belief an individual has in him/herself to do things they never dreamed they could do. Essentially, self-efficacy reflects confidence in the ability to exert control over one’s own motivation, behavior, and social environment.

People with Low Self-Efficacy

  • See challenges as threats
  • Withdraw from difficult tasks
  • Have lower aspirations
  • Weaker commitment to goals
  • Focus on limitations and failures
  • Give up quickly in the face of challenges

People with High Self-Efficacy

  • See challenges as goals to be mastered
  • Set challenging goals and maintain commitment
  • Sustain efforts in the face of failure in order to achieve
  • Learn and grow from failures and try again….never give up

Most if not all of us act in some capacity of leadership, be it in the workplace, or as a parent, teacher, or peer. In so doing we exert significant impact on those we have influence. Parents, impact a child’s self-efficacy when they provide an environment that stimulates the child’s curiosity and allows them to master their experiences.

A teacher’s confidence in his/her own abilities to teach can impact how successful his/her students will be.

Peers model each other’s experiences. She did it and therefore I can; or the converse, he did it and failed. Therefore if I try, I too will also fail.

You Can Totally Do This

Formally, there are 4 factors that influence Self-Efficacy:

  1. Performance Accomplishment considers mastering (your)self.
  2. Vicarious experience observes others experiences. If others succeed, then I can succeed. If others fail, I will fail too.
  1. Verbal persuasion as in “you can totally do this“; or you can’t do this, or that.
  2. Physiological which occurs through physical sensation such as how you feel. For example, we are scared of public speaking. We become anxious and portray the belief that we are going to fail. On the other hand, we feel anxious but the anxiety does not portray feelings of failure but that of excitement and achievement that we are going to do well.

Are You Where You Want To Be In Life?

Now take the time to think about your dreams, goals and aspirations. Are you where you want to be in life? Dig deep into your inner being and find that motivation… deep down because it exists. Bring it to the forefront of your mind. Start thinking positive thoughts like “I can do this!” Then Grasp the things you need to take the first step. If you need help, connect with a mentor, or a friend who has your back, or get a coach. But whatever you do, don’t let the next time you look back, you are standing still.

Make that daring move to start today. I dare you!

Need help? Lets connect.

Cheers!

When Life Knocks…

When Life knocks you down, get back up 

Alena planned an inaugural event for an organization in need. It was going to be grand. Sponsors actively participated. The media agreed to show up. Surprisingly the greatest struggle came from the organization’s leadership. It seemed it was going to be a failure. A little saddened and downcast she continued planning the event’s activities. Naturally, fear, anxiety, agitation and more reared its ugly head. But she plodded on.

Amazingly, like an Astral, the event turned out to be just grand! A tremendous success. She walked away with key learnings for the next year. Yup! There’ll be another.

So when life knocks you down; when sickness, pain, sudden job loss, marriage fails, children falter, relationships go south; cry if you must but just stay focused on your goal. You’ll get there with consistency, tons of hard work, and persistence. Find a mentor, a confidante, or Coach who will help you ride the waves. Never Give Up. Let go of the negatives and remember, nothing good comes easy. Stay the course. You’ll get there.

Cheers!

Connect with Me.

3 Directions. Which One Are You?

pexels-photo-54379.jpeg

Do What you Can with What you have, Where you are.  ~Theodore Roosevelt

~Melanie is at a crossroads in life. She graduated college, got a job and has been working ‘just because‘.

~David has worked as a senior manager for over 10 years but over the past three years he has been dreaming of more. His sense of purpose has been lost. He feels he is drifting.

~It’s been 4 years since Carol lost her job due to restructuring. Since then she has worked odd jobs, has big dreams but through fear hesitates to take the step to Enroll to accomplish her goals.

~Mark dreamed of his passion. Took the steps to achieve and now enjoys the benefits of his entrepreneurial ventures. Still he seeks more ways to learn, develop his skills, and grow.

We have all been there. Life’s crossroads beckons times of reflection pushing us to search deep within our souls to find out if there’s more to life. We ponder about the next step. Where should we go? What should we do? How should we do it? or should we do it at all? John Maxwell speaks about the 3 kinds of people when it comes to Viable directions in life. These are:

3 Kinds of People in Pursuit of Goals

1.People Who Don’t Know what they would like to do.

These people are confused. They dabble, drift, with no sense of direction. If they grow, it is without focus.

2. People who Know what they would like to do but Don’t do it

These people are Profusely frustrated. They worry, they fear. They want to step out but are afraid they won’t be able to take care of their responsibilities. Sometimes they are not willing to pay the price to learn, grow, and move closer to their dream. Sadly, these people also miss out on reaching their potential.

3. People who know what they would like to do and do it.

These people are fulfilled. They possess a strong sense of passion, they achieve their purpose, they grow, they learn, they develop. As they strive for more we Chuckle thinking they are perfect but they know better as they seek continuous development.

You may also like What Does Success Mean to you?

This was previously shared but it’s now time for a revisit. Look back on the list, which type resonates with you? Consider. Reflect. Share. Puzzled and need help? Let’s connect.

Cheers!