Why Are We So Afraid?

Celebrity Adrienne Bailon of The Real, and The Cheetah Girls movie, questioned herself “what if people don’t like it?” What if her music is not accepted?

I shared recently the responses received from entrepreneurs to the question what’s stopping you? It was no surprise when the responses were summarized, they boiled down to Fear. People are afraid to step out. They are afraid of failure and of what other people may say.

Celebrity Adrienne Bailon of The Real, and The Cheetah Girls movie, when asked why she was not singing confessed that she was scared. She was afraid. She questioned herself “what if people don’t like it?” What if her music is not accepted? She went on for awhile talking about her fears.  We gasp because we cannot fathom someone at that level who has enjoyed success over time to still be afraid.

As we Knit together the various facets of our lives we often feel like an underdog in different areas. We may be successful at one area and feel afraid to step out in another.

If you are like Adrienne, I implore you to take that Percussive step. What if you fail? To that I say….at least you tried. Also I suggest that we stop taking life so seriously. Do some things just for the love of it! Just for fun! When we adopt that kind of thinking, we find that we often succeed and find ourselves able to soar, to achieve great things.

So today if you are afraid, take the step to try something new. Who knows, you may surprise yourself.

Ready to get your goals in order? Lets connect!

Cheers!

 

What’s Stopping You?

 What’s stopping you? 

That was the question asked. It’s fitting for those who are stuck. Those who have dreams, goals, and aspirations yet like a Nested   Sludge, do nothing to progress towards achieving them.

Why do we hesitate? Why don’t we step out and do what needs to be done? What holds us back?

Here I share some of the responses from individuals to the question posed.

  • Fear …period
  • Confidence
  • Not believing in myself
  • Laziness
  • Fear of Failure
  • Fear of the What if’s
  • Judgment of others
  • Not knowing where to start and not having the means
  • Lack of money
  • Fear of failure and having possible regrets
  • Selecting career
  • People
  • Being disappointed
  • Possible rejection
  • Procrastination
  • Platform
  • Capital
  • Double faced people
  • Lack of confidence and confused
  • Discipline
  • Pain and fear
  • Losing people who I love
  • Interacting with people
  • Daily conflicts with people but they are not stopping me just standing in my way
  • Myself
  • Self doubt
  • Lacking purpose
  • Over-thinking, over panning and procrastination
  • Afraid of others opinion
  • My past
  • Sadness
  • Uncommitted to my decisions
  • Fear of future
  • Fear of Success
  • Lack of Motivation
  • Fear of Change
  • Rejection
  • Afraid of standing out
  • Fear of being ridiculed
  • I need to believe in myself
  • Purpose

It seems fear, and pleasing others top the list of what’s stopping most people from doing what they want to do.

How about you? Does any of the above resonate with you? Do share.

Cheers!

Fear. Overcome It…

Don’t Dwell On it.
My daughter text and said “Mommy, I‘m afraid”. I asked “what are you doing”? She replied “watching the news all day and social media. Now they’re talking about the effects of past hurricanes.”
Stop. Turn the TV off, or change the channel.
Aren’t we all like that? When we fear something challenging coming up, we become afraid. We binge-watch the issue in our minds over, and over, and over again.  We can’t sleep. We play the Fear game.
It might be nervousness for an impending interview, it might be a change in position and we feel ‘they’re going to find me out’. For sure they’ll discover that I’m a fraud….I can’t manage the work for the promotion.
It might even be that you’re getting married. The closer you get to the date, fear or anxiety sets in the midst of the excitement. Will it last? Will we be compatible? And on, and on, and on we go.
Like I said to her …Stop, don’t dwell on ‘it’. It will only lead to harm.
Instead, Focus on what you CAN do about your situation. Overcome. Do Something positive. Bask in the preparation. Protect your family. Prepare your responses for the interview. Prepare, prepare, prepare. Focus on the positive.
Prepare. Pray. Relax. Breathe. Then you won’t be caught off guard.
Cheers!

Who Moved My…

I went to the grocery store that’s been in the same locale for more than 10 years. As I stepped in, the Traditional Fragrance of the familiar faces was missing. Confused, I enquired, where are they? I was told that the owners sold the business and had moved to a different location for a bigger and better venture.

I felt cheated. Immediately I decided I’d go find them for… how could they do that to ‘me’?!

Then I started thinking about my own passion. Daily I encourage individuals to take the leap…, go do what you have always wanted to do. Yet here I was–feeling cheated. How dare me?

Has that ever happened to you? We love the familiar. The thing that so Harmonizes and makes us comfortable. Safe. Tranquil. At peace. When it’s gone, we feel a hollow in our life…in our soul. I reflect on the book “Who Moved My Cheese”, which became famous because of its simplicity yet profound impact.  The late Spencer Johnson told the story about the Change that takes place in a maze with amusing characters as they searched for cheese. It’s metaphoric delight draws us in as we identify with the characters. Those of us who sniff, scurry, hem, and haw at the sight of change.

Today, I return to my usual self, I am thrilled that the management of that Grocery Store decided to move on. They have gone to achieve their dream. They had taken the bold step to higher heights.

Is there someone you’re blocking from achieving his/her goals? How about you? What’s your own plan for the next 3-5 years? How will you get there? Step aside and allow yourself, family, friend, or foe …(yikes!), to achieve what you/they have always wanted.

Afraid? Let’s connect!

Cheers!

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A Moment Of Weakness… Ain’t No Lollipop..


A moment of weakness. Devastating consequences.

A father was seen hitting his son. Onlookers called the cops. The rest is as we know it. The father was barred from seeing his son in order to protect the child’s perceived safety. This despite cries from his wife and others that he is a great dad.

A drink or two at a party, then getting behind the wheels to drive home. Impaired… it’s called.   Driving under the influence impairs our ability to function well. Accidents happen causing injuries; sometimes fatalities.

A moment of weakness. Enrollment in college goes asunder. Future’s impacted as dropout rate catapults.

A moment of weakness. The common intimacy. Resulting consequences…unwanted pregnancy. Abortion. Sadness. Childbirth without care. Impacts negatively on relationships, marriages…, divorce ensues.

A moment of weakness often impacts goals. Maintain focus. Develop the ability to say No. No to the drink. No to the advance. No to the things that distracts, and painstakingly drags you off  the direct path toward your goals.

A moment of weakness. Think before you act. Aint no Lollipop.

Stay strong.

Cheers!

Lets Connect!

Goals: What’s Holding You Back?


I met Daisy Ferguson at a Writers Group event. She shared how she wrote her first book after being afraid to meet an almost Edible request at age 86. She published it at age 88. Now she’s onto finishing her 2nd book at age 90! Indeed no small feat!

What Excuse do you have for not achieving your Goal?

Afraid? Let’s Connect

Goals: When Things Converge…

What are you afraid of? Go ahead, do it now….even when you’re afraid. You never know…

Convergence is the merging of distinct technologies, industries, or devices into a unified whole


Illiana awoke with a start. She is going to do it! Moxied, she grabbed the phone and courageously spoke with her former part-time boss, John. For months she has been thinking about her internship but was paranoid that she would be turned down.

This time luck was on her side! A past associate and colleague recently connected with John for an opportunity but he didn’t have the time to assist. But he promised he would think about it. Now here was his chance… Illiana had all the time in the world to dedicate to this project for a full year of internship!

Amazing! Totally supernatural! Savor it! When faith works, everything converge.

What are you afraid of? Go ahead, do it now….even when you’re afraid. You never know… it may converge with another person’s dream.

Ever had ‘converging’ experience? Do share.

Cheers!

Afraid to step out? Let’s Connect

Success Speaks…


It’s always a Bumbled pleasure to do what I love to do. I coach, educate, inspire, encourage, and I motivate. Watch this Top 5 video as a testimonial of encouragement for individuals like YOU who are afraid to step out to do what you’ve always wanted to do. He did it and when probed… reflected, and was surprised at the successful impact he had on society. Watch. Learn. Bust the Fear! and step out to accomplish your Dreams today.

Cheers!

Let’s connect 

 

 

What Have I Done? This is Crazy!

New job offer. Relocation. Tons of change. Excitement in the midst of fear.  But it comes with the territory. Getting up and going to another land…faraway. Giving up the familiar …

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What have I done? This is crazy!

New job offer. Relocation. Tons of change. Excitement in the midst of fear.  But it comes with the territory. Getting up and going to another land…faraway. Giving up the familiar is no Snack. It is scary… but when we do it, we learn new things about ourselves and about others.

Have you ever watched HGTV’s House Hunters International? Well if you have, you would know that those who take on moving from one country to the next have brave hearts. They give up jobs, family, friends, and often wish they could take their home culture with them. Often they must give up a lot. China! New Zealand! Paris! Japan! The Caribbean! and more for those fascinating new ventures!

We often say we want a change yet we want to hold onto the familiar. It’s normal. In my early career managing international HR, I had the task of sending executives to relocate overseas. It intrigued me so much that I studied Cross Cultural Management. It was often a challenge for those who took the step. But those who embraced the host culture survived beyond the honeymoon stage. They became acclimated to the new culture filled with its languages, people, food, and new experiences.

But like anything else, it works if we stick with it. Naturally if you find yourself among those who don’t like the experience after you’ve done it, no problem. At least you can still say “I did it“!

Only the adventurous can gleefully say “what have I done? This is crazy!” with a smile and the satisfaction of new learnings, and exposure.

Cheers to the new adventurous you!

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