The Power of the In-Between: Leading Through Life’s Transitions

Sometimes God brings times of transition to create transformation. ~Lynn Cowell

Transition is not a sign that something’s gone wrong.
It’s often a sign that something deeply right is trying to emerge.

Whether you’re navigating a career pivot, stepping into leadership, returning to yourself after raising children, grieving a loss, starting over, or simply outgrowing who you used to be — you are not lost.

You are in motion.
And motion is sacred.

Transitions Aren’t Detours

So many of us have been taught to treat transitions like detours. Inconveniences. Delays.
But in my experience — and maybe in yours too — transitions are not detours. They are invitations.
Invitations to pause.
To listen.
To lead our lives more deliberately.

There’s a quote I love:

Sometimes when you’re in a dark place, you think you’ve been buried but actually you’ve been planted

So if you’re feeling buried right now — by uncertainty, or fear, or change — know this:
You’re not stuck.
You’re becoming.

Whether it’s career change, motherhood, empty nesting, loss, or reinvention — transitions are not delays. They’re sacred invitations to pause, realign, and step into something deeper.

Who You Are Becoming is Just as Important as What You’re Doing

Our default in transition is to rush into action.
Update the resume. Apply for roles. Rebrand the business. Hustle harder.
But what if the first step wasn’t “What should I do?”
What if it was: “Who am I becoming?”

Because clarity doesn’t come from more motion.
It comes from alignment. From asking:

  • What do I no longer want to carry?
  • What am I being called to step into?
  • What version of me is ready to emerge?

This is your opportunity to shape your next self, not just your next job title, or business pivot, or life chapter.

You Don’t Have to Navigate This Alone

One of the hardest things about transitions? They can feel so lonely.
Especially for women who are used to being the strong ones, the fixers, the go-to for everyone else.

But here’s what I want to say to you today:
You are not alone. And you’re not the only one feeling “in between.”

Let this season be one where you ask for help.
Where you find community.
Where you give yourself permission to rebuild — slowly, honestly, bravely.

Because you don’t have to have it all figured out to move forward.
You just have to decide you’re worth the becoming.

Wrapping it Up

So if you’re in transition today — good.
It means you’re alive.
It means something inside you is shifting. Growing. Healing.
Honor that.

You don’t need to go back to who you were.
You are being invited to rise into who you’re becoming.

And I promise — she is worth the wait.

Going through a transition and feeling confused? Let’s connect

Cheers!

Success Stories: 15 Women of Color Who Self-Published

“A word after a word after a word is power.”

Margaret Atwood

The publishing process can be intimidating for an unknown writer. The traditional Agent-Publisher-Author relationship is hard. Rejection after rejection is common as Agents say ‘no’. Writers become discouraged and often give up. Manuscripts stay in the darkness of desk drawers for years.

As time has involved, so has the advent of self-publishing. Writers become bold and take advantage of their publishing plight. They make bold moves; step ahead, take the reins to achieve their publishing goal of becoming an author. With low budget and unplanned expenses, some cut corners and quality becomes compromised. Book covers are mediocre. Titles lack depth. Formatting is non-existent, which leads to the demise of some great manuscripts.

On the other hand, some writers step out, work hard, invest, learn the process, and viola! Success follows!

Self-Publishing Success

Here are 15 Authors of color who achieved significant success through self-publishing:

  1. Toni Morrison – While primarily known for her traditionally published works, she self-published her first novel “The Bluest Eye” before gaining wider recognition
  2. Terry McMillan – Initially self-published her debut novel “Mama” before securing a publisher for subsequent works
  3. N.K. Jemisin – First self-published some of her fantasy work before becoming the first author to win the Hugo Award for Best Novel three years in a row
  4. Alexandria House – Found success self-publishing contemporary romance novels featuring Black characters
  5. Kristen Ashley – Built a dedicated following through self-publishing her romance novels before signing with traditional publishers
  6. Brenda Jackson – Pioneer in African American romance who began with self-publishing before becoming a New York Times bestseller
  7. Alyssa Cole – Initially self-published her diverse romance novels before becoming an award-winning author
  8. K.M. Jackson – Self-published romance author who found success writing diverse contemporary stories
  9. Nikki Turner – Self-published her first urban fiction novel before becoming known as the “Queen of Hip-Hop Fiction”
  10. Beverly Jenkins – Started self-publishing historical romances featuring Black characters when traditional publishers showed little interest
  11. Sister Souljah – Self-published “The Coldest Winter Ever” which became a groundbreaking street lit phenomenon
  12. Nnedi Okorafor – Self-published some of her early Africanfuturist works before winning multiple prestigious awards
  13. Kiini Ibura Salaam – Award-winning speculative fiction writer who self-published collections of her short stories
  14. Octavia Butler – Though mostly known for her traditionally published works, she self-published some early stories
  15. Zane – Built an erotic fiction empire beginning with self-published works before launching her own publishing company

These authors demonstrated outstanding entrepreneurial spirit and literary talent often creating space for Black women’s voices. This occurred at a time when traditional publishing wasn’t receptive to their work. Many of these women went on to sign traditional deals. Suffice it to say they proved their commercial viability through self-publishing. Others maintained independence throughout their careers.

Need help to get over your fear to make the leap? Let these women inspire your journey. Thoughts about any of these or other women of color who have experienced success? Do share. We would love to hear.

Cheers!


Setting Boundaries: A Key to Work-Life Balance

SAY NO

Stop asking why they keep doing it and start asking why you keep allowing it.

Setting boundaries involves defining expectations and limits in relationship (Positive Psychology). Here are 5 characteristics to help balance your work/ life.

1. Self-Care Prioritization

  • Regular exercise
  • Quality sleep
  • Healthy nutrition
  • Meditation/stress management techniques

2. Boundaries Setting

  • Clear work-life separation
  • Learning to say no
  • Limiting overtime
  • Scheduling personal time

3. Professional Support

  • Discuss workload with supervisor
  • Seek workplace accommodations
  • Consider professional counseling
  • Join support groups

4. Mental Reset Techniques

  • Take regular breaks
  • Practice mindfulness
  • Use vacation days
  • Pursue hobbies outside work

5. Systematic Recovery

  • Identify stress triggers
  • Develop coping strategies
  • Regular mental health check-ins
  • Gradual lifestyle adjustments

Here’s hoping these tips will help you achieve your work / life balance goals.

Understanding Emotional Exhaustion: 5 Key Signs

Self-care is how you take your power back

Lalah Delia

Long days at work, inability to meet financial needs, household chores, relationship strains. All these can take a toll on us at times. Here are 5 signs associated with burnout. Read and examine each. Then apply it to yourself.

1.Emotional Exhaustion

Feeling drained, overwhelmed, and unable to recover from daily stressors, with persistent mental and physical fatigue.

2.Decreased Performance

Reduced productivity, struggling to concentrate, missing deadlines, and experiencing a significant drop in work quality.

3.Detachment and Cynicism

Developing a negative, indifferent, or callous attitude towards work, colleagues, and responsibilities. Feeling disconnected and unmotivated.

4.Physical Symptom

Experiencing frequent headaches, sleep disruptions, changes in appetite, weakened immune system, and increased vulnerability to illness.

5.Lack of Work-Life Balance

Feeling constantly preoccupied with work, inability to disconnect, neglecting personal relationships, hobbies, and self-care activities.

Are you experiencing one, two, or a few of these signs? Stay tuned for practical solutions. Any missing that you would like to add? Do share, we would love to hear.

Cheers!

Photo by Frank K on Pexels.com

Why Year-End Triggers Career Reflection

You can get excited about the future. The past won’t mind. ~Hillary DePiano 

The end of the year naturally invokes a period of career reflection, which serves as a psychological milestone that compels professionals to pause and assess their journey. As the calendar approaches its final weeks, individuals are instinctively drawn to introspection, triggered by a combination of cultural traditions, personal goal-setting practices, and an innate human desire for growth and meaning. This time of reflection is fueled by the contrast between the year’s accomplishments and unfulfilled aspirations, creating the opportunity for honest self-evaluation (hint …that common ideal weight loss plan).

Also read: Conquering Transition Doubts

The approaching new year symbolizes renewal and potential, encouraging professionals to reflect on their career trajectory, measure progress against past objectives, and recalibrate their professional vision. Factors like annual performance reviews, financial assessments, industry shifts, and personal life changes converge during this period, making it an ideal time to critically reflect on career satisfaction, skill development, alignment with long-term goals, and potential opportunities for growth or transformation.

Consequently, here are a number of pointers that discusses this period of reflection along with recommendation. Not a self-starter , we can help.

Natural Evaluation Period

  • Annual performance reviews
  • Reflecting on past year’s achievements
  • Setting new personal goals
  • Psychological reset moment

Emotional Triggers

  • Holiday season brings perspective
  • Family gatherings prompt life discussions
  • Increased time for self-reflection
  • Motivation from new year anticipation

Professional Burnout

  • Accumulated workplace stress
  • Desire for meaningful change
  • Recognizing current job’s limitations
  • Seeking personal fulfillment

External Evaluation

  • Social conversations about resolutions
  • Seeing others make bold moves
  • Increased motivational content
  • Feeling inspired by potential

Strategic Approach

  • Budget reassessment
  • Career growth opportunities
  • Market trend observations
  • Personal development planning

Motivational Approach

  • Embrace fear as growth signal
  • Start with small, low-risk steps
  • Build confidence gradually
  • Seek professional guidance
  • Create solid transition plan

Recommended Actions

  • Self-assessment
  • Skill inventory
  • Informational interviews
  • Part-time exploration
  • Professional coaching
  • Continuous learning

Are you experiencing any of these signs? If so, it’s time to do something about it. Adapt the motivational approach along with the recommended actions. But if you need the expertise of a coach who can help. Better yet, purchase a gift certificate for a friend experiencing these signs and help him/her kick off the new year with a difference.

Making Big Decisions: Head Or Heart?

Decisions. Decisions

A new year paves the way for ‘change’. As we approach 2025 many of us will make decisions that will impact our lives. Decisions in our entrepreneurship roles, decisions in our relationships, career (stay or go), and in our personal and professional lives.

The question was asked on social media about decision-making. When making decisions do you make them using your ‘head’ or ‘heart’. Respondents quickly chimed in with 29% preferred ‘head’, while 71% preferred ‘heart’. Decided to break down head decisions vs. heart decisions and analyze their roles and characteristics in decision-making.

Head Decisions (Rational / Logical)

  1. Characteristics:
  • Based on facts and data
  • Relies on analysis and reasoning
  • Focuses on practical outcomes
  • Uses systematic evaluation
  • Considers long-term consequences
  • Weighs pros and cons objectively
  • Driven by logic and evidence
  1. Best Used For:
  • Financial decisions
  • Business strategies
  • Career choices
  • Investment planning
  • Risk assessment
  • Legal matters
  • Technical problems

Heart Decisions (Emotional / Intuitive)

  1. Characteristics:
  • Based on feelings and intuition
  • Relies on personal values
  • Focuses on emotional satisfaction
  • Uses gut instincts
  • Considers personal fulfillment
  • Weighs emotional impact
  • Driven by passion and purpose
  1. Best Used For:
  • Personal relationships
  • Creative pursuits
  • Life purpose decisions
  • Value-based choices
  • Personal fulfillment
  • Passion projects
  • Meaningful connections

Which is Better?

Neither is “better” – both have their place

  1. Integrated Approach:
  • Best decisions often combine both
  • Head ensures practicality
  • Heart ensures alignment with values
  • Balance creates sustainable choices
  1. Context Matters:
  • Some situations need more logic
  • Others need more emotional intelligence
  • Most benefit from both perspectives
  1. Decision Framework: Best Practice: Use Both
  • Heart: Initial guidance
  • Head: Validation and planning
  • Heart: Final gut check
  1. When to Lean More on Head:
  • High-risk situations
  • Financial commitments
  • Legal matters
  • Complex problems
  • Strategic planning
  1. When to Lean More on Heart:
  • Life purpose decisions
  • Personal relationships
  • Career passion
  • Creative endeavors
  • Value-based choices
  1. Integration Tips:
  • Start with heart to identify what matters
  • Use head to evaluate feasibility
  • Check back with heart for alignment
  • Plan execution with head
  • Monitor satisfaction with heart
  1. Warning Signs: Head-Only Decisions:
  • Feels empty or unfulfilling
  • Lacks personal meaning
  • May lead to regret
  • Could miss opportunities

Heart-Only Decisions:

  • May be impractical
  • Could be financially risky
  • Might lack sustainability
  • Could be too impulsive

Real-World Example: Career Change Decision:

  • Heart: Identifies passion and desired impact
  • Head: Evaluates market demand, salary, skills needed
  • Heart: Confirms emotional alignment
  • Head: Creates transition plan
  • Both: Monitor progress and satisfaction

Recommendation

  1. Use a Balanced Approach:
  • Start with heart to understand what you truly want
  • Use head to evaluate feasibility and plan
  • Check back with heart for alignment
  • Execute with head’s planning
  • Monitor with both heart and head
  1. Decision-Making Process:
  • Identify the type of decision
  • Consider the stakes involved
  • Use appropriate balance of both
  • Create evaluation criteria
  • Make and implement decision
  • Review and adjust as needed
  1. Questions to Ask: Head Questions:
  • What are the facts?
  • What are the risks?
  • What are the long-term consequences?
  • What resources are required?

Heart Questions:

  • How does this feel?
  • Does this align with my values?
  • Will this bring fulfillment?
  • What does my intuition say?

Points to Note

  • The best decisions often come from balanced input from both head and heart
  • Different situations require different balances
  • Practice integrating both perspectives
  • Trust both your logic and your intuition
  • Monitor outcomes using both metrics

So there you have it. A thorough overview of when and how to make decisions with your head and heart. What type of decision-maker are you? Head or Heart? Do share, we would love to hear.

Ahh Coaching: Trouble The Comfortable

The interesting thing about coaching is that you have to trouble the comfortable and comfort the troubled.

Ric Charlesworth

Professional development involves coaching. It is a process of self-awareness, application and reflection. Improving yourself through learning and training has advantages. Just as great sportsmen hire coaches, professionals can improve their craft with a personalized and objective coach.

That said, people’s perceptions of coaching necessity vary and there are myths, but there is a growing recognition of its value in professional development.

  1. General perception: There’s been an increasing trend towards viewing coaching as valuable, particularly in corporate settings. However, it’s not universally seen as “necessary.”
  2. Executive coaching: A survey by the International Coach Federation (ICF) found that about 86% of organizations saw a return on investment from coaching. This suggests a high perceived value among those who have experienced it.
  3. Leadership coaching: Many large companies now include coaching as part of leadership development programs, indicating its perceived importance.
  4. Career coaching: The demand for career coaching has grown, especially with the rapid changes in the job market and increased career transitions.
  5. Percentage who think it’s necessary: It’s challenging to give an exact percentage as perceptions vary widely across industries, cultures, and individual experiences. However, here are some relevant statistics:
    • A study by the Harvard Business Review found that 48% of CEOs who had coaching said they were open to changing their behavior as a result.
    • According to a report by PwC, 50% of firms surveyed used coaching as a key part of their learning and development programs.

These numbers suggest that while coaching is increasingly valued, it’s not universally seen as “necessary” by everyone. The perception tends to be more positive among those who have experienced coaching or work in organizations that regularly use coaching services.

It is important to note that these figures can change over time and may vary significantly depending on the specific context (e.g., industry, individuals, company size).

So there you have it. Different perceptions of coaching and it’s necessity. Many understand and appreciate its value. Are you one of them? What’s your own perspective? Do share. We would love to hear.

Cheers!

Writers of Color Women’s Empowerment Initiative

“Ask yourself, what would I do if I weren’t afraid? And then go do it” — Sheryl Sandberg

Inspiring. Intentional. Take charge. Grow. These were common words that described the Writers Group of South Florida’s Women Empowerment Event held at the West Regional Library in Plantation, Florida.

Guests turned out in numbers to be educated or refreshed as seasoned authors shared nuggets on leadership, balance, wellbeing, and becoming financially independent.

Thanks to fellow writer GMoss Designs for being Instrumental and singer songwriter Ettosi Brooks for the delightful music entertainment.

Panelists Award winning Reggae legend Miss Pat Chin and others did an exceptional job in highlighting the challenges women face as well as the Strategies to overcome.

Missed it? Plan for it Next year same time.

Cheers!

16 Ways For A Procrastinator To Get Things Done

Procrastination makes easy things hard, hard things harder.

Mason Cooley

Author? Writer? Project Manager? On-the-job administrator? Are you one of those persons who find themselves with several lists of things to ‘finish’? Procrastinating it’s called. You start doing laundry, then realize you need to mow the lawn, or pick up groceries so off you rush to do that leaving several observable tasks undone. You mean well but it keeps happening. A task here, another there and on and on it goes. You never seem to catch up.

Well for people who struggle with completing projects and find themselves juggling multiple unfinished tasks, here are some effective strategies:

  1. Prioritize and focus:
    • List all ongoing projects.
    • Rank them based on importance, urgency, and potential impact.
    • Choose 1-3 top priorities to focus on exclusively.
  2. Break projects into smaller tasks:
    • Divide each project into manageable, specific steps.
    • Create a detailed action plan for each step.
  3. Set clear deadlines:
    • Establish realistic timelines for each project and its components.
    • Use a calendar or project management tool to track deadlines.
  4. Implement the “Two-Minute Rule”:
    • If a task takes less than two minutes, do it immediately.
    • This helps prevent small tasks from piling up.
  5. Use the Pomodoro Technique:
    • Work in focused 25-minute intervals, followed by short breaks.
    • This can help maintain concentration and prevent burnout.
  6. Create accountability:
    • Share your goals and deadlines with a friend, colleague, or mentor.
    • Regular check-ins can help keep you on track.
  7. Limit new commitments:
    • Learn to say “no” to new projects until current ones are completed.
    • Assess carefully before taking on additional work.
  8. Eliminate distractions:
    • Identify and minimize common distractions (e.g., social media, unnecessary meetings).
    • Create a focused work environment.
  9. Celebrate small wins:
    • Acknowledge and reward yourself for completing project milestones.
    • This builds momentum and motivation.
  10. Re-evaluate regularly:
    • Periodically assess if projects are still relevant or necessary.
    • Be willing to abandon or postpone projects that no longer align with your goals.
  11. Use visual progress tracking:
    • Employ kanban boards or progress bars to visualize project advancement.
    • Seeing progress can be motivating.
  12. Address perfectionism:
    • Recognize if perfectionism is causing delays.
    • Focus on “good enough” for initial completion, then refine if necessary.
  13. Schedule dedicated project time:
    • Allocate specific time blocks for working on projects.
    • Treat these as non-negotiable appointments.
  14. Seek closure:
    • Develop a habit of finishing what you start, even in small ways.
    • Practice completing minor tasks to build the “finishing” muscle.
  15. Learn from past patterns:
    • Analyze why projects typically remain unfinished.
    • Address recurring issues (e.g., lack of resources, skill gaps).
  16. Use the “Sunk Cost Fallacy” awareness:
    • Be willing to let go of projects that are no longer serving you, regardless of time already invested.

Are you a procrastinator? If so, did any of the above appeal to you? Hope you find a few useful. Note that by implementing these strategies, individuals can improve their project completion rates and reduce the stress of managing multiple unfinished tasks. The key is to find a balance between focus, organization, and flexibility.

Happy Finishing!

30 Common Side Hustles To Choose From …

It’s not how much money you make, but how much money you keep, how hard it works for you, and how many generations you keep it for.

Robert Kiyosaki

Women often face unique financial challenges due to various societal, economic, and cultural factors. These challenges have been exacerbated especially since the pandemic. To become financially independent simple solutions through participating in additional income streams can help.

There are many side hustles people pursue to earn extra income. Here’s a list of common and popular options.

  1. Freelance writing or editing
  2. Virtual assistance
  3. Social media management
  4. Online tutoring or teaching
  5. Web design or development
  6. Graphic design
  7. Photography or videography
  8. Rideshare driving (Uber, Lyft)
  9. Food delivery services (DoorDash, Uber Eats)
  10. Pet sitting or dog walking
  11. House cleaning or organizing services
  12. Personal shopping or errand running
  13. Selling handmade items on Etsy
  14. Dropshipping or e-commerce
  15. Blogging or vlogging
  16. Podcast hosting
  17. Affiliate marketing
  18. Renting out a spare room on Airbnb
  19. Selling items on eBay or Amazon
  20. Online surveys or user testing
  21. Transcription services
  22. Voice acting or voiceover work
  23. Personal training or fitness coaching
  24. Lawn care or landscaping
  25. Car detailing
  26. Bookkeeping or accounting services
  27. Resume writing
  28. Translation services
  29. Music lessons
  30. Event planning or coordination

Before You Choose

When considering a side hustle, it’s important to:

  1. Assess your skills and interests
  2. Consider the time commitment required
  3. Evaluate the potential income versus effort
  4. Ensure it doesn’t conflict with your primary job
  5. Research any legal or tax implications

Did any of the above side hustles appeal to you? Here’s hoping you got a few ideas to choose from. The only caution is to make sure that your skills are up to par with the side hustle selected. And also to be mindful of your work/life balance.

Happy Hustling!

12 Common Financial Problems Women Face

Women and Challenges Faced

At the end of the day, we can endure much more than we think we can.

Frida Kahlo

Women often face unique financial challenges due to various societal, economic, and cultural factors. Lots of changes on the horizon albeit slow. Here are some common financial problems that women frequently encounter:

  1. Gender pay gap: On average, women earn less than men for comparable work, which affects their overall financial health.
  2. Career interruptions: Women are more likely to take time off work for caregiving responsibilities (children or elderly parents), impacting their earning potential and career advancement.
  3. Longer life expectancy: Women generally live longer than men, requiring more savings for retirement and potentially facing years of managing finances alone.
  4. Lower lifetime earnings: Due to pay gaps and career interruptions, women often accumulate less wealth over their lifetimes.
  5. Underrepresentation in high-paying fields: Women are often underrepresented in STEM and other high-paying industries.
  6. Financial literacy: There’s often a gap in financial education and confidence in managing complex financial matters.
  7. Divorce financial impact: Women may face significant financial challenges following divorce, especially if they were not the primary earner.
  8. Single parenthood: Single mothers often face additional financial strain managing household expenses on a single income.
  9. Investment gap: Women tend to invest less and more conservatively than men, potentially leading to lower long-term wealth accumulation.
  10. Healthcare costs: Women typically have higher healthcare expenses over their lifetime, including reproductive health costs.
  11. Debt: Women, on average, carry more student loan debt and may take longer to pay it off due to lower earnings.
  12. Entrepreneurship challenges: Women-owned businesses often face greater difficulties in securing funding and investments.

Can you align with one, two or a few? Any challenges missing that you can add? Please share. We would love to hear.

Cheers!

Empowering Women’s Ascent

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Empowering Women’s Ascentrb.gy

We can endure much more than we think we can.

Frida Kahlo

Empowering Women’s Ascent. A great event for sisters, friends or colleagues to boost your self esteem, increase your knowledge, set goals, become assertive, practice self-care and more. The Writers Group of South Florida’s upcoming Women’s Empowerment event promises to be inspiring and an event not to be missed. It will be held at the West Regional Library Broward Boulevard, Plantation, Florida on Saturday, September 28.

Attendees will be inspired by thought provoking topics including:

  • Women in Leadership: Empowering Women to rise into leadership roles to reach their full potential
  • Learn the Challenges women face and the strategies to overcome
  • Breakthrough: Transitioning from Burnout to Balance helping driven women and busy moms transform their thinking and redefine balance in their lives
  • Achieving Financial Independence: Enabling women to gain control of their financial futures and becoming financially secure.

The event will be cemented by an exciting Panel Discussion with Founder, VP Records and Lifetime Achievement Award Recipient Patricia Chin (Miss Pat).

Other guest speakers include Dr. Susan Davis, Attorney Asiah Wolfolk Manning, The Sisters and yours truly, Dr. Shelly.

This empowerment event promises to be great. In South Florida? Plan to attend and if you’re not, we will revert with all the Deets post event.



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